Lessons Learned: How to Put on a Condom

June 1, 2015

I was 53 years old before I tried to put a condom on a man. Tried being the operative word. It was our first time to have sex. I thought it would be fun to try and put it on myself, incorporating it in our ‘sex play’.

The lights were dim and I had taken off my glasses—can’t have sexy sex if you’re wearing glasses, right?  I couldn’t see the condom very well. There I was straddling him, trying to make it look sexy—squinting and fumbling. I couldn’t tell that I had it wrong side out. Giggling, which wasn’t the mood I was going for, we had to throw the first one away. I started over with a new one but ended up letting him take over.

Good for us for taking precautions. But, I should have been a little more knowledgeable. I’m not alone in being uneducated about condoms. Women typically leave it up to men to do the buying and donning of the condom. What I didn’t understand then was the importance of both parties taking responsibility for using protection during sex.

I was about 55 when I shifted my focus as a freelance writer to the topic of sexuality. Writing about my dating experiences and the newness of sex as an older divorced woman, I found a lack of quality information and resources on sexuality and sex education for adults. I’ve expanded my work to public speaking and I offer presentation at national conferences and various smaller venues on dating and sexuality for older adults. I was ranked #5 in Kinkly.com’s 2014 Sex Blogging Superheroes and I write sexual health columns for a couple of websites. I’m excited about my new gig at GLYDE, talking to you about topics related to sex, health, sustainability and condoms.

I routinely carry condoms and I’m more than willing to start the conversation with partners to make sure we’re both protected. Awareness, education, practice… I look forward to bringing resources, helpful tidbits, and sexy stories in the news to you over the coming weeks and months.

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Walker Thornton is a writer, sex educator and public speaker. Her blog, WalkerThornton.com, was ranked #5 by Kinkly.com in their top 100 Sex Blogging Superheroes of 2014. She is a strong advocate for women’s sexuality, encouraging women to ‘step into their desire’. Walker is the Sexual Health columnist for Midlife Boulevard and writes about sex and the older adult for Kinkly.com. You can connect with her on her website, Facebook, or Twitter.

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